Heart-Breaking

My heart is breaking. There isn’t much that I can say at this point about my daughter’s illness except that she is in the ICU.

Thursday is my usual day for blogging about spiritual issues.

But I don’t think I IMG_0661can do it. All I can think of is my precious grown daughter, hooked up to monitors, an IV tube dripping glucose and maybe some helpful drugs into her system.

What do you do when your heart is breaking?

You scream, you weep, you try to reason with God.

You acknowledge your complete helpless and utter dependence on God.

Why don’t you heal my daughter? Why does it have to be like this? God, are You even listening?

I’m so hurt, so scared, so angry, so desperate.

Why God? Why God? Why God?

Help her. Help me.

Then the Lord reminds me that:

  • This is an evil world. Jesus said, “in this world you will have trouble”
  • “I (Jesus) have overcome the world.” John 16:33
  • Always keep on praying. Eph. 6:1
  • “He  (Jesus) will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain for the old order of things has passed away.” Rev. 21: 4

I hold onto these words because in them are God’s love in His offering of life and hope. And faith.

Curious, that just a few weeks ago I chose these very words to adorn the bulletin board above my office desk:

Faith, Hope, and Love.

Was God preparing me to receive the kind of news that puts a chill in every parent’s heart?

He’s calling me to have faith in Him, that nothing is beyond His power or His notice. That He is indeed good beyond measure, and faithful and true.

He’s calling me to pray without ceasing. He’s calling me to praise Him even when I can’t see how my daughter’s illness could possibly be a good thing.

I will continue to trust Him because I’ve experienced His faithfulness for 62 years.

And His faithfulness does not merely extend to our short stint on this earth. His plans for me and for you are for our eternal good.

Pray for my daughter, please!

 

 

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